Family Heroes

As a teenager, it was common for me to come home to having a grandparent in the house.  Both my father's father and my mother's mother spent time with us toward the end of their lives.  When I was nineteen years old, I lived for a year as a missionary for my church in Guatemala. A severe knee injury cut short my time with the wonderful people I grew to love there.  I returned home to have my anterior cruciate ligament repaired.  My mother talked Grandma into coming to stay with us by saying that I needed her there to nurse me back to health.  On my first day out of the hospital she told me of being a young woman and working as a nurse's aide at the local hospital.  Sponge in hand, she scrubbed me, telling me how she had been taught to "wash down as far as possible, then wash up as far as possible, and then washing possible."  I grabbed her hand and said, "Grandma, I'll take care of possible."  As Alzheimer's Dementia would later rob her mind of memories, I cherished the times we spent together.  Later, coming home from college, she loving looked at me and declared, "I used to know you!"  Her overall concern was that she did not want to be a burden to her family.  She spent time with all four of her children.  The bond and memories with Grandma was more than worth any burden caused by her care.

My grandfather also spent time with us.  Towards the end of his life, heart failure sapped his strength.  Ultimately he was done in by a fall which resulted in a subdural hematoma-bleeding around the brain.  He became too much to handle for my parents alone and ultimately spent his final days in a nursing home.  It was a difficult decision to make. The care received at the end of life is a decision that affects generations.  I have an elderly couple in their mid 90's.  The wife has Alzheimer's and the husband has been weakened by aspiration pneumonia and a blood clot to his leg.  They became too frail to live on their own.  An attempt to live with a daughter in a far away western state resulted in agitation and delirium.  The decision was made to bring them back to their home and their granddaughter now oversees their care.  She works full time during the day and spends every night with them.  The family has hired care givers during the day.  This loving granddaughter is spelled by her husband on the weekend.  I am amazed by her dedication.  I have no doubt that they have received better care than they would in any institution.

Family heroes come in many shapes and sizes.  Another patient of mine is a widow with no children of her own.  Her mind has slowly slipped, though she is loathe to admit to any problem.  She saw her husband decline from Alzheimer's and is terrified of having the same happen to her.  Her nephew has taken it upon himself to direct and guide her care.  He persists patiently despite my patient's unwillingness to admit to needing any help.

I feel strongly that our society is blessed by generations living together and spending time together.  Benefits are seen not only to the elderly in need of assistance and care but also to the youth who are able to get to know their grandparents better.  Nursing homes will always be needed to provide care that can not otherwise be given.  I want to salute those who stand up and take on the challenge of caring for loved ones.  They are healthcare heroes  Who are your family heroes?  Share with me your stories.